In Alexandria, LA, thieves cleaned out one home, including the kitchen sink. And, in Milpitas, CA, someone walked off with the town's jail, a trailerlike affair on wheels.

A Denver thief, who apparently thought big, took an earth mover, 22 feet long, 10 feet high, 10 feet wide, painted bright yellow. To add on to the large items, a 15 x 25 foot signboard weighing 1,000 pounds was removed from its foundations in Chattanooga, TN. And a three-room display house was stolen in Mobile, AL, along with a German shepherd dog purchased as a watchdog.

Another thief in Los Angeles was arrested for stealing a bus, remarking that he had always wanted to drive something big. And for the third time in four years, a man in Baltimore was arrested for stealing an airplane.

An auto thief returned a stolen car to a man in San Diego after using it a month, and complained in a wordy letter that it needed new spark plugs, a wheel alignment, a new radio and that the back seat was very uncomfortable.

A careless thief in Los Angeles threw suede jackets out of a store window. Two policemen, after getting out from under the pile, made the arrest.

A widow in Buffalo had $8. taken from her cash register. However, the gunman had given her a $10 bill for a purchase, which she kept. Net profit: $2.

Some burglars have an odd sense of humor. In Wichita, KS, a burglar stole liquor from a home, then proceeded to cut off the left legs of 17 pairs of trousers.

Ice box raiders at Hutchinson, KS, really hit something besides food. They found $2,400 in stocks, four valuable rings, plus important papers. The owner said he used the refrigerator as a strongbox because it was insulated and nearly fireproof.

In Tucson, AZ, a returning couple found burglars eating ice cream and drinking milk in their kitchen.

A thief stole the battery from a police cruiser in St. Louis. And two policemen at Coon Rapis, MN, finding a gasoline can standing at the rear of their police car, arrested the man underneath who was stealing gasoline.

Police in Phoenix, AZ, surrounded a motel and demanded through a loudspeaker that a bandit surrender. In addition to the wanted man, two others sought for burglary walked out. The surprised pair thought the police were after them.

At LaPlace, LA, thieves stole 150 alligators from a snake farm.

A watchdog at a home in Kansas City, MO, watched quietly as a burglar robbed his master's home and then bit the policeman sent to investigate the crime. In Spartanburg, SC, a tire company had eight tires, money and the company's watchdog taken.

Two prisoners escaping from a work farm near Wheeling, WV, took the prison bloodhound along with them. A dognaper in Miami telephoned the owner and asked him for the dog's diet.

Thieves broke into a man's apartment and stole his wooden leg. A man in Peoria, IL, after installing a burglar alarm, had it stolen almost immediately. A friendly thief in Homewood, PA, shook hands like a long-lost friend. After he left, the hand-shaker realized that his $245. diamond ring was gone.

Police arrested Malinda Kelly of Mechanicville, New York, on numerous charges, but only after they had scurried around for hours trying to find her "stolen" car and her three-month-old son, who was inside. Kelly's story didn't hold up for long. Actually, said police, she had forgotten where she had left the car, which was idling with the child inside, while she ran down the street to burglarize her uncle's home. She came away with some money, investigators say, but lost a bunch of her own when a stranger reportedly reached inside her waiting car and snatched her purse.